Dr Feelgood stikes again

Are you getting your daily hit of  Validation?

Though the message is simple, its obviously one people needed and wanted to hear.  Written directed and composed by Kurt Kuenne and starring TJ Thyne & Vicki Davis, Validation has won a string of esteemed awards and gained immense popularity around the globe. 

Validation’s Awards

* Best Narrative Short –  Cleveland International Film Festival

* Best Short Comedy – Hawaii International Film Festival

* Crystal heart Award – Breckenridge Festival of Film

* Best Short Film & Audience Award – Heartland Film Festival

* Best Short Film – Sedona International Film Festival

* Christopher & Dana Reeve Audience Award –  Williamstown Film Festival

* Best Comedy – Dam Short Film Festival

* Audience Award – Gen Art Chicago Film Festival

* Jury Award Winner

Validation..  we all need it from time to time


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You saying Im the Govt’s bitch.. Obligatory Viewing

The ‘war on drugs’ is being funded by tobacco, alcohol and pharmaceutical companies.. Why??? 

Barney Frank’s comment ‘This notion that we somehow have to approve or criminalize all human activities is a great misunderstanding of Governments’   really turned flicked the switch for me.. 

I feel like I’ve been living in a cloudy haze and have just walked into the clear clean air.. I never thought about life from this perspective before.  

I certainly don’t need the govt to define all my activities into good  bad/ right wrong/ approve  criminalize  categories.  I’m a decent person and I can think for myself.  I can make my own judgements.

If we are not hurting other people or our planet, then it is our god given right to live love and laugh in whatever way we feel like it! 

Who do governments think they are, putting their noses so deeply into everyones business. They don’t own us, we are free people.

The role of government is to be our representatives not our masters!

how many times have you said this to yourself..

Simple exercise for to boost your self development & personal growth 


Only takes a few minutes but has an incredible impact.  Good luck

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Babies…. No thanks..Life is great just as it is.


In my 20’s and even early 30’s when the question of children came up, I was one of the girls who quickly piped up with ” my maternal instincts seem  non existant, I think life is giving me a message”

At 35 I still didnt think I wanted to have children. Life was brilliant just as it was.  A constant adventure  of excitement and fun, I didnt think I needed to add anything to my already fabulously blissful life. It was perfect.

At 37 , life was just as perfect as it had been two years before. I was on a super fantastic journey, an amazingly  exciting experience, full with adventures.  However, when I asked myself  ‘the children question’ again, the No didnt come up quite so immediately.  Something within me had changed.

My boyfriend at the time ( now my husband) was not at all ready to think about kids. He was not even sure he wanted them.  On the surface, I was feeling like him, yet something subtle and much deeper was tugging at my decision strings.

After some contemplation, I realised it was fear poking me ever so gently. An internal voice had begun to wisper sweet nothings in my ear… ‘The maternal time clock is ticking girl, are you sure you dont want kids?  its all very well to say it while you still have the choice.. but what about when the choice is taken away due to age.. how will you feel then? ‘

Ohhh gosh.. what a nightmare!  I really didnt see where children would fit.  We had such a great life, completely free.  We could work and travel whenever and whereever we wanted and we loved it that way.  We travelled  3-5 months of the year and worked the rest of the year in all manner of jobs, in all manner of countries. The world was our oyster. Freedom was ours and we loved this spontaneous style of living. 

With a boyfriend not ready to think about it and me not wanting to think about it, the inner voice who felt it was essential to think about it, become personal enemy number 1. 

I tried to contemplate the idea, tried to visualise it, but no matter what I did, it just didnt conjure up any excitement.  I spoke to a friend who was 43. She, at 39 was certain she didnt need to add something to her life. She was more than happy with her lot and was not considering children. At 42 it changed, but so had her body. It was too late. And she regretted it.  Ughhhh!!

At 39, it was really time to be mature about all this and make some decisions, before the decisions would be made for me!  Discussions ( sometimes seeming more like full scale battles) began to happen more and more frequently in the house hold.  I was having trouble making the decision and was projectiing my fury at my husband that he couldnt either.

At 40, our decision was made. We were going to go for it. We admited we were afraid, we admited life was still super lovely with just us, but we also both admited that the idea of children had somehow begun to have a little sparkle to it.  “We will never be anymore ready for it than now, so lets just go for it. We will be great parents. ”

At 41, we are now seeing speicalists as no babies have come naturally. My husband has a few sperm issues and me.. well.. the doctors say at 41 I am considered quite mature for the reproduction zone.  The general tests I’ve done,  all point to a young, fit and healthy woman, none the less 41 is a mature age for procreating, so there are issues.

I dont feel bad that I am where I am. My life is and has been amazing and I wouldnt change it for the world. I am a little nervous though.  I hope it all works out ok.  Interestingly, next to the nerves, there is a sense of confidence or perhaps even faith. Life has always taken great care of me. Everything has always worked out for me… so I am going to put my trust in the process of life yet again.

Ive decided to write about the experience as I go along in case it helps others in some way who may be going through something similar. Either trying to decide whether to have children or not/trying to have children later in life as we are.

Ill try to share the facts, the difficulties, the Dr’s feedback, the process, the tests and hopefully in the end the fabulously positive results.

So tip 1:  There are a few basic tests available to give you a basic idea of how your reproductive health is. its good to know this information regardless of where you are at in life.   

guys  –  sperm test will let you know the health of your sperm. See your GP. He may refer you to a specialist but the test is simple and non invasive. Results are back to you in a day or two.

girls – hormone level test (blood test done on 3rd day of cycle) Our hormones are at their highest apparently on this day so Dr’s can get an indictation of our general reproductive health from this.

Ultrasound on day of ovulation –  to see if eggs are being produced ok.  This does a few things. Firstly it allows you to learn the exact day of ovulation in your cycle. It also allows the Dr to see if the eggs are the right size at ovulation time.  Apparently the Dr can also see if you have a healthy amount of eggs.  The Dr will discuss the results with you.

I had these tests done recently. I ovulate on day 15 of my cycle. I have the hormones of a 17yr old and seem to have plenty of eggs. All looking good so far.  The Dr says the results are great. He does say though, that while all these things are positive, the fact still remains that my eggs are 41 yrs old. (we apparently get all the eggs we are going to have in our life at once. We dont get anymore.) So whatever we have we have, and they reduce in numbers each cycle and each year. So time is of the essence and we need to be very active in our endevours to have a family.

My husbands low percentage of normal healthy sperms could be a problem. Before we go deeper into though, the Dr thinks its important for me to get a womb test to see if there are any abnormalities. I plan to call and book the test today, so will keep you updated in this.

Few other tips:  With the focus on my cycle that trying to have a baby naturally brings, I noticed that I am a very moody around ovulation time. Obviously good for me to know, since intimacy is important for procreation!!  I have shared this with my husband and we are both trying to create a more gentle quiet environment in this time.

I have also begun to have weekly accupunture to help balance things out emotionally and prepare my body for pregnancy and am also taking omega 3 and folic acid. 

Until next time


Amazing way to feel and look 10 years younger

never a better time to help yourself and help the planet.Turning 40 brought its fair share of emotions. First the sense of disbelief.. Gosh really 40 ..how did that happen so quickly.. I dont feel like 40! Do I look 40, do I behave like a 40 year old..and so on and so on..

The next step was reflection.. remembering the years gone by, the adventures, the challenges and the ups and downs on the roller coaster ride of life.  Taking a little mental check to see if I was satisfied with what my life amounted to til now…a great gift to myself.

It was a really enjoyable process, meandering through the endless field of memories cultivated from 40 years on our glorious planet.  Many many forgotten faces, experiences, and feelings came back into the here and now…Very pleaseant.

A great trip down memory lane… and a wonderful way to begin creating a little blueprint for the next 40 years of fun. Seeing what still inspires you, what you  would still like to do/achieve/try/create & experience

In a few days I am 41. I am feeling great. I bought a bicycle and am loving the expereince of scooting  about the city. Its connects me to the eternal child within, gets the blood circulating, is super healthy and great for the environment AND is a wonderful way to nuture ones vitality. Discovering places in your neighbourhood  you didnt even know exist is a frequent joy on a bicycle. 

Want to be rid of the heavy feelings of forty-dom? Want to leave this feeling way behind you?  Want to feel and look younger, feel more vital, feel more alive than you have for years ?

Get a Bike ladies and gents I promise.. it will change you, change you from within. I cant reccomend it enough!!


Until next time


Life changing tips

I love life and wouldnt give up the opportunity to be here for quids!! But its not always easy for me to feel  joy and contentment in the hustle and bustle of modern day life.

Life is so fast paced these days, all go go go and sometimes I feel completely overwhelmed by it all. I have been asking myself how can I try to live my life with inner peace and joy when all around me is a seemingly chaotic world?

Structure!  it seems has been the key for me.  Putting structure in my life is helping me to feel a sense of balance, a sense of calm and a greater sense of wellbeing.

Here is a brief outline of what I have structured into my life.  As we are all precious individuals, we each have our loves,  financial buget &  time frame to work with. If for instance your buget will not allow for a monthly massage, then consider scheduling one every 2,3 or 4 months and if time doesnt allow you a meditation space everyday for 30mins then consider 2 or 3 times a week or even once a week.

The key is structure, so its more about consistancy. Hope there’s some ideas here to inspire you.

Until Next time



morning ritual – see my easy morning ritual page

30 mins meditation

10 mins focussed breathing -currently feeling the breath move in and out of my body though the nose 

Eat 1 piece of fresh fruit

take omega 3



1hr walk once a week

1hr accupuncture session

1hr bicyle ride around the city

3hrs volunteering  – currently  cooking supper on a monday evening in a childrens refuge home.

30 mins email/skype connecting to friends/family  from afar (living abroad)

30 mins sending distant healing to friends/family with current illnesses/ emotional challenges

2hrs learning something new – currently learnng about Bach Flower Remedys

1 night a week going to bed early and just enjoying a great night sleep.

1 night a week going to bed early with my husband nuturing intimacy (usually twice week)

watch the sunset once a week.

30 mins gazing at the moon once a week.


1hr massage

Day with family of my husband

Meeting with an old friend to catch up on life

Baby sit  for a friend with kids so they can go out together

2hrs doing something creative

Princess Vs Witch – accepting we are both!


The past few days I have been an absolute witch!! Moody, temperamental & over sensitive. 

A few years back I would have given myself a VERY had time for this unpleasant state of mind, but today, I just observe it and lovingly accept that this socially unacceptable part of my character is well…. Part of me

and I SIMPLY LET IT BE …  part of me. 

What is it about humans that we so often do not allow ourselves to be anything less that joyous jubilant and ecstatic at every moment in our life? 

Ok granted, for all but the extreme emotional Sargent majors types of the human race who keep the stiff upper lip, we do allow ourselves a little morsel of misery if loss or extreme despair finds its way into our life, but on the whole , it is not something we welcome.

We do not ask this forlorn emotional friend to stay for as long as it wants or needs. Instead we scowl stare and hiss at it constantly until it feels so unwelcome, its only option is to head deeper into the Forrest’s of our soul to hide, unexpressed, misunderstood and given no value or respect.

Why does the moody, melancholic side of ourselves disgust us so much? why do we see it as such a distasteful reality?

If we accept that where there are mountains there will be valleys, where there is night there will be day & where there is winter there is summer  why is it so incomprehensible to grasp and accept where there is joy there will be sadness? 

I have been looking at this  phenomenon within the boundaries of my own character for the past year and the results were quite shocking. 

I was truly amazed at my incapability to accept and love myself when I was not a happy jovial friendly sociable chicky.

Why was my love towards myself so conditional?   Who was this Trojan master within who tried to dictate what feelings I needed to have in order to be worthy of self love?

Doing some reflection into my childhood I realised that sadness and melancholy were not really accepted or honoured nor allowed to be truly expressed.

In fact, I remembered we were actually punished for it. Sadness was an unsavory character trait in our household. Good kids were happy kids. 

Sounds totally wacky from my adult perspective. So why had I not changed this the minute Id left home and was free to live my life how i wanted?   A simple case of unawareness. I had not realised this core belief was within me.

The melancholy, introvert, mood  was seen as a bad side of me and I was afraid that if I expressed this and let myself BE – maybe people – friends family lovers would react to me as my family had in childhood and I had in adulthood.. and disown me..  cast me  aside…  punish me…  and lets face..we all want to be loved right ?

Another important discovery was the feeling that my moodiness would bring others down with me, that somehow I felt responsible for other peoples happiness so couldn’t live the full spectrum of my own emotions.

I also noticed that intense guilt came from being moody as well.. who was I to be unhappy? Look at my life I am blessed, I have so much good fortune that being in an unhappy or melancholic mood was being ungrateful for all that life had given me.

There was a sense of fear of the unknown as well. How long I would be a witch? I had meetings, weddings, dinners to go to..how could I go feeling like this? No no best to push this one under the carpet, tell it strongly to GO AWAY! and get on with my life as miss happy pants.

After all who needs or wants the sometimes unanswerable questions being asked..Whats wrong with you? Why are you like this? 

Armed with all the insights into why I was unconsciously rejecting this side of me, it was now time for the process of change.

Firstly, I brought alot of awareness to my responses/reactions to both my own and others moods.

I then with patience and love tried simply to observe my moods trying to release any judgement that came.  

I  practised positive affirmations that I loved myself exactly as I am and that it was perfectly OK to be miss moody cow if that was my true emotion in that moment. I made an agreement with myself to accept whatever mood I was in without putting a tag of good or bad on it.

I learnt that it was OK to change plans if I was not feeling social, and to feel comfortable to tell friends and family with an open heart that I am not feeling very social. 

I learnt that not every emotion needs to be investigated or analysed. Sometimes you just are moody. So what! No big deal as long as I took responsibility for my mood and didnt inflict pain on anyone else!!

I realised that my allowing the moods to BE, they usually passed as quickly as they came. 

I  tried to drop feeling guilty. Accepting that as a human being with a dynamic spectrum of emotions and moods, it is absolutely perfectly OK for me to be flow through life sometimes up sometimes down. Again No big deal.  

Living more truthfully with the range of emotions and moods that are within me, I feel I am living a more balanced wholesome existence. I feel more real, I feel more honest. 

I also feel I am being much kinder and  a whole lot more loving towards myself which feels really nice. And this more caring attitude towards the self unconsciously allows me to show others more kindness, empathy and respect. 

Nice journey of self discovery. glad I went for the ride!!

until next time 

love and light