Dr Feelgood stikes again

Are you getting your daily hit of  Validation?

Though the message is simple, its obviously one people needed and wanted to hear.  Written directed and composed by Kurt Kuenne and starring TJ Thyne & Vicki Davis, Validation has won a string of esteemed awards and gained immense popularity around the globe. 

Validation’s Awards

* Best Narrative Short –  Cleveland International Film Festival

* Best Short Comedy – Hawaii International Film Festival

* Crystal heart Award – Breckenridge Festival of Film

* Best Short Film & Audience Award – Heartland Film Festival

* Best Short Film – Sedona International Film Festival

* Christopher & Dana Reeve Audience Award –  Williamstown Film Festival

* Best Comedy – Dam Short Film Festival

* Audience Award – Gen Art Chicago Film Festival

* Jury Award Winner

Validation..  we all need it from time to time

 

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Love – The Fact is…. it takes work!

courtesy of the art of happiness.com

courtesy of the art of happiness.com

 

If one listens to all the hype on love and reads all the fluffy books available, one could easily be mistaken in thinking that love is easy, that love is a breeze.

Reality is however, although love is one of the most amazingly wonderful  experiences we will have in our lives, it can be hard work.  It takes enormous effort and awareness to really experience love in all its magnificence. 

Ask anyone who has loved deeply for long periods… all will say the same ..there are many moments on the journey of love when love doesnt feel very magnificent at all!!! 

There are three general stages of love.  The Honeymoon period is a truly magical experience. Everything is so rosy, so right and so much fun. Its full with desire, wonderment and lust and the unforgettable thrill of connecting to a new body and a new energy feels amazing.

This person, with their new ideas, new opinions, new dreams and new perspective on life is so stimulating.. Wow wow wow we say to ourselves, love feels absolutely fantastic!!

The next phase on the love journey however, is a little less grandiose, though very necessary to experience in order  to get to the more meaningful reality of love.

Sometimes it takes a year, sometimes 2 weeks, but it happens, stage two arrives and  it’s when the ‘work’ in love begins. Things about your partner begin to get on your nerves. Things that you once loved about him/her because it made them unique, made them different than anyone you have known before, now start driving you absolutely crazy.

The unusual habits and the moods no longer amuse you, let alone thrill you. Buttons begin to get pressed, insecurities surface, tempers start to flair and life together is now more volatile. Life with the other starts to feel uncomfortable. Sounding a little familiar?

‘Different’ now no longer holds the same appeal. A yearning for something more familiar creeps up. You start to feel like you need more space, like you want to take a bit of your life back. You begin to realise that this ‘together all the time’ business is a maybe a little too much for you. You just want some aloneness, some ‘me’ time!

Sadly, so many potentially interesting  and deeply satisfying relationships finish when this period arrives. The change is too uncomfortable, the honeymoon was so nice and easy.. who needs this struggle!!

However, it is in this period, that love can really begin to grow. All these feelings that make one question our love are completely NATURAL!!! It doesnt mean that there is a flaw in your love, or that the love has disappeared, it simply means that the other side of the coin is now having its time in the spotlight.

There are two sides to every experience, to everything in our reality. Day night, joy sadness, aloneness togetherness, rain drought, full moon no moon, high low, valleys mountains..I can go on and on with examples..but the important realisation is that one does not exist without the other. Or more specifically, we would not know the existence of one without the other.

In the blissful honeymoon period, feelings of togetherness are strongly experienced, hence it is only natural that this feeling will transform to a need for aloneness. Nothing wrong with this, its the way, our wise inner self brings balance to our lives.

There is a wide spectrum of feelings to be experienced in love and the need for more space and  moodiness towards one another are simply part of the program. 

It’s how you deal with these challenges as they arise, how you communicate your needs to the other, that opens the door for the fowering of love. Learning to give respect and to have tolerance are very necessary in love.

Accepting these feelings when they arise and not going too deeply into them is the key.  There is no need to feel uncomfortable, they are completely natural.

Rather than projecting your need onto your partner by blaming him/her that its not working or you need to get away because they are doing ‘this’ or ‘that’, take responsibility for them.  Your needs are natural, they arise in all relationships, there is no need for blame, none at all.

Its natural a partner may feel a little hurt or insecure hearing your needs for the first time. After all until now you have been happy to be with them.  Remember, It is no fault of theirs, or yours, that these needs have surfaced.

They would arise no matter who ‘the other’ is.  Think about that for a moment just to let it sink it a bit deeper.. these needs will arise no matter who the other is.. 

Think back to how you felt after the holidays with the family? Or after a big weekend with friends. Did you have an urge to be alone afterwards or to distance yourself a little from others? An urge just to be with yourself?

This is the same principle,

Listening to your needs and communicating them honestly to the other, helps enormously on the journey of getting to know one another. It can be frightening and will naturally take practise to gain confidence, but it develops trust and a sense that its OK to be yourself, which opens the doors of the heart wider for deep love to enter. 

The benefits of honest relating are limitless and will allow you to move more gently and compassionately through the challenging post honeymoon stage, allowing  the relationship to evolve into something deeper than the simple desire that initially brought you together.  

Deep love is a combination of the honeymoon and the aloneness periods. Its truthful, its spontaneous and it is respectful of oneself and the other.  It acknowledges that each is an individual with different needs..needs that the other can not always fulfil, nor should be expected to.

When its safe to express ones needs, you celebrate each others uniqueness, you offer each other freedom and it is in this space, that love truly blossoms. 

LOVE  is allowing, supporting and encouraging  ourselves and our partners to become the best and the greatest that we can possibly be. Its offers freedom to express and to do, go and be who ever we want to be in this life.

Its not easy, this love business, but it does allow us an amazing opportunity to know ourselves and another.. it is a beautiful journey of self discovery and in my opinion, the reason why we are here.

To discover ourselves. To know ourselves more, to accept ourselves more.. thats the purpose of life and love is the very exciting path in which we do this.

Want Tips on how to communicate your personal needs?  click here

 

Until next time

Mysticmiss

Having trouble understanding how to express yourself to your partner? Go to for tips.

Humanity Ascending.. The most inspiring movie released this decade

Ever watched a movie that touched your heart, your mind and your soul so deeply that you wanted to let the entire world know about it because you believed it had the potential to change the world?

Humanity Ascending, in my opinion is one of those movies.  And judging by their personal reviews, Deepak Chopra, Marianne Williamson and Rev. Michael Beckwith all feel the same way.

Barbara Marx Hubbard has done an incredible job of giving me hope that our world can move through this terribly destructive phase of existence we are currently in and progress to a new reality.. one filled with positive communication, love and compassion.

I urge you to take the time to watch this movie, I urge you to tell your friends and I urge you to spread the word of this masterpiece so that its message can be shared with the world. 

If you have seen this outstanding movie, please take a minute to share your thoughts via the comments section below.

View Humanity Ascending Online:  www.themanifest-station.com/ascending/

Learn more about Barbara Marx Hubbard: http://www.humanityascending.com/index.html

Until next time

love and laughter

mysticmiss

Looking for meaning in your life … dont miss this tip!

 

There are not many people I come into contact with nowdays, who are not, in some way, searching for meaning in their lives or put another way, looking for the purpose of their life.

Yet, when it comes to finding helpful tools to aid us on our search, I am always baffled by the amount of useless information peddled on the internet under the banner ‘Finding your life purpose’.. much of it is simply mumbo jumbo with no real depth or clarity. 

When a friend recently gave me a website to check out, I was grateful for her thoughtfulness, but didnt really get that excited about it.. what a mistake!!

Yesterday I visited the website and WOW!! its absolutely fantastic! Its exactly what I have been looking for.

Manifest-station.com offers so much choice. There are many styles of teachings available to help you find your way.  Movies, lectures, book ideas, a forum and even an online TV station full with inspiring talks 24/7… I was delighted, it’s a great find. 

Viewing ‘The Manifest-Station’ is completely free. No sign-up. No hidden agenda. No Barriers. Just click, watch and grow.  There is even a program guide for the so you go online at a specific time to watch the shows that interest you. 

There is a wealth of information available for the ‘seekers of purpose’ from around the globe.

http://www.themanifest-station.com/index.html   go check it out, its fabulous!

Until next time, be healthy, be happy

mysticmiss

Tell your husband he’s wonderful

After a particularly hectic day, my husband came home from work mentally and physically exhausted.  We had a light dinner and laid on the couch together, chatting about our individual days.

As we were talking, I realised ( yet again)  how wonderful he is.What a sweet  man he is.  What a delightful soul i am sharing my life with  and how lucky I feel to that he is in my life. 

I told him all of this and though he smiled and thanked me quite casually, I could see in his eyes just how much it meant to him to hear these words from me.

We are all more than aware of how important it is to acknowledge childrens efforts. To express our feelings towards them, letting them know how we love them and how well they are doing, to share how proud of them we are etc etc but we sometimes forget that this need carries on throughout our lives.

It doesnt stop at 18,20, 25 or even 30.  We as adults need  and thrive on the same encouragement and re assurance that we are doing ok as children do. 

Ok as adults we need to learn not to depend on others for this, we try to learn to do this for ourselves. BUT, its still a wonderful gift to give to a loved one.. truthful, heartfelt and genuine encourgement and love.

When I expressed my simple truthful comments to my hsuband, he appreciated it, it helped him feel good.. and it helped remind me to be more aware of this need not only in my wonderful husband, but also my friends and my family.

Thanks existance for the reminder.  Awareness, its such a magical journey

until next time

mysticmiss

The ‘Professor of Sperm’ says.. Try this Before IVF

 

So where were we… oh yes..

‘The Womb X-Ray’  (HSG)   

The ‘professor of sperm’  has reccomended that BEFORE  we start with IVF that I get a womb x-ray to make sure my womb, tubes and god knows what other reproductive pathways are clean and clear. 

If there is a blockage of any sorts, it could well be one of the things preventing us conceiving naturally as sperm may not be able to get  where it needs to be.

It’s apparently not uncommon for women to have minor blockages and  this test can detect them. Interestingly, the Dr carrying out the test told me that the very process of procedure can often be helpful in clearing the pathways as well.   

The procedure needs to  be done in the time frame between when you have stopped bleeding and your ovulation day….. AND  you are not permitted to have sex in this time

A quick re cap of that  – the first day of your period is day 1 of your cycle, so the test ideally wants to be done any day between day 5 – 10 of your cycle.  I think its a good idea to book the x-ray appointment in advance so you are booked in for 2 -3 days after you have stopped bleeding.

By being organised, its all out of the way and you are then free to have copious amounts of sex to try and get those little swimmers up where they are meant to be and waiting patiently to meet their match, come ovulation time!!

And hows this for a bit of positive feedback.. the Dr who performed my x-ray said that in the cases where ovulation and sperm counts/movements etc are healthy and normal in a couple  but conceiving has not been successful..  40% of those women fall pregnant after this procedure.  Ok I am not in that catagory, we  are part of the ‘problem sperm gang’,  but still it was nice to hear.

Onto the procedure.. I had mine done in the x-ray dept and It took about 10 minutes. The appointment was at 7.30am and I was told to have a light breakfast. It was a little invasive. Legs spread, the Dr put a plastic device inside me to open things up.  It reminded me of the device used when having a pap smear to open things up – the cold metal thing. Ok so this was a little uncomfortable. Next, the tube, like a drip, is put inside you. This is how the dye will be filtered in.  Inserting this was also a little uncomfortable, but not too bad though.  

When the dye/substance was filtered in I felt a  very strong pain. Like an incredibly strong period cramp suddenly coming. It was a bit of a shock, to be honest, I didnt think it would hurt that much.  It only lasted perhaps 40 – 60 seconds though and was then all over.  I did feel quite tender throughout the rest of the day.

I  got my results within the hour. All is clean and clear. The Dr said there was a minor blockage, hence the strong pain, but that the procedure cleared it and all is now fine… And that was that.  

He suggested we have sex as many times as we can in the next days running up to my ovulation to give ourselves a chance of conceiving now I am blockage free. So we will see.. I have an appointment with Prof. Sperm in the next few days as he wants to see the results and we will go from there.

Link to article on HSG X-Ray:http://www.ivf-infertility.com/infertility/investigations/female/hsg.php 

Please remember I am not a Doctor, nor even an authority on this subject. My language/explanations are relatively informal and my explanations may not be completely accurate. It is important that you do your own research and to always consult with your Doctor for clarification.

The purpose of this and all my posts on IVF and my road to pregnancy is simply to share my experiences  with others who may be in a same or similar situation. 

I hope this has been some help. Your feedback, thoughts, feelings, ideas are all so welcome. I look froward to hearing from you.

Until next time

mysticmiss

Music listeners …A tip not to be missed!

last.fmA few weeks back I received a tip from an avid music fan  to go to last.fm and check it out.

Having enough music in my house to listen to well into my next few lifetimes, I didnt heed his advice and visit the site immediately.

This weekend however, with a little time on my hands I decided to go take a look. WOW WOW!! great stuff.

last.fm is super easy, you put in your tags and then the site plays you an endless stream of music. If you like a track there is an option to add it to your play list or to tell last FM you loved it, and also an option to ban a track if it is not to your liking.. the more you listen and the more  you click love or ban or save, the more the site gets aquainted with your personal taste.

As the site learn your taste, the quality of the music they play for you improves, and it doesnt take long.. each time I use the site the music seems to step up to another level. I am delighted, I am listening to a whole load of new music that i would never have come in to contact with before.

Its all about the tags. Tags are the words you use to find the music you want.. it can be a music style or an artist.. eg reggae dub, chillout, elctro funk etc etc  You can think of them yourself, you can look at the tags used on songs/tracks you enjoyed and use them, but the tags are the key.

WWW.last.fm   go check it out its great fun !

until next time

mysticmiss